The Other Side

It took awhile to gather thoughts and just put them into words. I would like to apologize for not writing as I should. I would hope to be better next time. We, the SBS class, started as four students, one changed his mind, then three of us left, then the other didn’t join anymore, then two of us were left: I and Grace, the Korean girl. It started with full excitement and ideals. But, somehow I realized that it was only me who had a desire to study and that the school leader pushed through with it because of me. However, I tried with all my strength to concentrate, but in just after a month, I received a call from my sister that I should come home because of my mother was very, very sick. I had no choice but to fly back to Olongapo City. True enough, when I came home, she was very weak and sick. She was hospitalized for 4 days. The doctor recommended her for Intensive Care Unit, but there was no slot in there. I had to be there every night and quarter of a day to attend to her needs. I thought, I was going to loose her. I ran out of strength and faith sometimes that I would just ask God for His will to be done. But miraculously, the doctor said, her situation was very impressive. Usually, a patient with sicknesses like hers would respond to the medicines after 3-4 days and if not she would be comatose. But just after a day, she woke up. She had to stay 3 more days to cleanse her system.

Currently, I am home taking care of my mother. She is totally dependent on me. I would change her diapers at night, feed her, bath her, bring her for check-ups and sees to it that she takes her medicines in time. She is 70 years old and very heavy..  My back hurts most of the time. I get lonely sometimes and bored because I am not used to this kind of ministry. I am always on the go, out there talking and encouraging people. But praise God for the moments of worshiping the Lord which is so pleasurable. I thank the Lord for the assurance that He will take care of me with no time nor age limit.. hehehe..

Back to the SBS School, I was asking the Lord, why was there a time that I really felt led that I should go to the school, despite of my mother’s situation. I shared it many times to the whole school. And then, my Korean classmate said, “God sent you to me”. Indeed, it wasn’t easy sharing a room with her. She has mood swings and very spoiled. Many times, I felt not welcomed in the room. However, I had to apply patience and understanding since I am older. She is a pastor’s kid, by the way. I would write her nice letters encouraging her to keep on believing that God has something in store for her. I would try to cheer her up and just bless her. But there was a time, when I was at my lowest point too, that I just stopped taking care of her. I just stopped. When I left Davao, I wrote her a very strong letter that I thought, it would be the end of it all. Surprisingly, Monday last week, she came to YWAM Olongapo. We met Thursday and just apologized to me.. She mentioned that my letter changed her life. She did not expect my letter to be very strong. She thought it would be nice like the previous ones, but the last one really spoke to her very core. And it brought her to her senses, yes, other people have problems too (not only her) and she should be taking care of other people by now. She decided to stay in YWAM Olongapo to volunteer in taking care of the children for a month. It is her first ministry. I was overwhelmed. I remember Jesus, in Matthew 8:18, Now when Jesus saw a crowd around him, He gave orders to go over to the other side”. Jesus saw the great needs around Him, yet He was not led by needs nor situations. He came to do what the Father wills Him to do. He sailed to the other side going through a strong storm; a storm that tried to disrupt a miracle that took place in the other side. He came to the other side just to heal one person who is a demon possessed. Just for one person. And that one person evangelized his town. I think, it’s the same thing that happened to me. Although, my mother needed me, I still left for Davao, for Grace. And Grace is much better now. She said that according to the people she met in Antipolo, the place she visited after Davao, they coulcn’t believe the big change in her life.

As of now, I am praying and hoping for my mother’s complete healing and full recovery. My hope and prayer is still to go back to Dharamsala, India. It is just that everything is on hold right now.

I hope to attend the YWAM’s National Staff Conference in from April 11-15, 2011 in Nasuli, Bukidnon. It would be encouraging to stay and connected with my ywam family.

This is all for now. The Lord bless you and keep you…

Gay Ann